She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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