She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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