Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
