Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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