We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize