Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
