where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
organizing the empties. That sober.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize