you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
