he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
