I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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