Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
