And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
We need to get me chipped asap
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
