***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
