Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
