I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
