Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
