I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
two words: eviction party
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
