return my video game
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
The ass gains better be worth it
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
