I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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