Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
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