Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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