Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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