So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
