Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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