How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize