she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
