why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
