Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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