ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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