I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Randomize
