You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
