I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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