so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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