I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
