Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
