Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
