If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
