In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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