my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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