playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
