what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Randomize
