he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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