You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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