The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize