I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Randomize
