After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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