But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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