who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize