if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
areolas are like halos for boobs.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
