i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize