Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
