took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
